Musings: I remember ……

Today is September 11 and it carriers so much memories for me and many people. I debated if I should post this but I felt compelled to. I don’t talk about it much but I work close to the World Trade Center and was there that day. Here is what I remember.

I remember already being at work that day and a loud sound.
I remember calling my Mom on the phone and hearing those words the World Trade had been hit. Then silence as the phones went out and we could not speak.
I remember not knowing what was going on and then the fear racing through us all.
I remember going to the lobby of my office building and seeing people coming in blanketed in ash and anguish in their eyes.
I remember the indecision if I should leave or stay at my office.
I remember deciding to leave and that first step outside which brought the taste of ash to my tongue and horror in my mind.
I remember my first step in ash too deep to even leave footprints.
I remember going around the office building and seeing those lone shoes and briefcase sitting there discarded.
I remember meeting a tourist who did not know which way to run.
I remember a terrible sound then a cloud of smoke rushing at us.
I remember running, running and finding strength I did not know I could ever have.
I remember the rumors that the Pentagon was gone and the White House was no more.
I remember that first breath of air free of ash.
I remember the cup of water pushed into my hand by someone trying to help anyway they could.
I remember the droves of people walking without shoes, clothing, and no idea of how we would get home. No knowledge of what had really happened.
I remember the hours after struggling walking, running and finally able to catch public transportation.
I remember the bus ride done in anguished silence.
I remember walking up the block to my house.
I remember the door opening and my mom there to catch me as I collapsed crying and happy to be alive.
I remember the seconds. minutes, hour and days after still not believing that it was real.
I remember the TV images of people pulling together to help then I remembered once again the cup of water that kept me going and I cried more tears.
I remember going back to work that first day after everything. The guns, fear and uncertainty on each corner.
I remember to pray for those found but forever gone.
I remember to pray for those lost and never found.
I remember the hope and perseverance of a city that had lost so much and world never forget.
I remember to thank god each and everyday that I made it out of alive.

Today is September 11 and I remember.